Y’all Ain’t Seen Nothin’ Yet!

SWMBO and I hosted a 50th Anniversary party for her friend (and husband) today and it went rather well. I guess. Some of her family showed up and not one punch thrown or bowl overturned on one head or anything.

Not like where I grew up around Los Angeles. There, it wasn’t a good party unless some of the above happened. I remember a wedding party in a downstairs apartment that ended with everyone punching each other out, men & women, that even got folks fighting up and down the stair. THAT was a party! And it was so easy to start; all the best man had to do was take the bride to bed AT THE PARTY and the fight was on! (Go figure!)

I wonder if the “lucky” couple stayed married?

Which brings to mind that SWMBO’s birthday is coming up at the end of the month AND our (even year? 2020 so yeah) 34th anniversary is December. Many is the year I combined her birthday, anniversary, and Christmas all into one giant present ($200 Jo Ann Fabrics card or such cause Quilters are easy to by for; fat quarters anyone?) but I think I’ll surprise her this year and “forget.”

Which she’ll believe cause I’m Old. It’s surprising how easy one can make their life just by claiming “I’m old and I forgot.” (Kids, don’t try this at home. Your Parents will know you’re BS’ing them. Unless you’re, like, 70 and your 95 year old Mom is still alive. And maybe you ought to ask her just what was she doing to have a kid at 15 anyway? That’s why she was so strict with you!)

Happy Halloween!I wasn’t always Old. It just kinda sorta happened over time. Snuck up on me; as it were. I swear I just woke up one day and BOOM: Old. Hell, now I can’t even get off the damn floor without making noises. Old Guy noises. And I’d better do it in the right order of there’ll be hell to pay: First, roll over and get on hands and knees. Yeah, I know it hurts but you gotta do it. Now, Right foot under you. Left hand grasping whatever is handy (see what I did there). Right hand pushing down in concert with the right leg trying to extend. GET YOUR LEFT LEG UNDER YOU!!! Now, still bent at the waist lift your head up and, OMG, you made it. Without calling for help! (Wait! I’m dizzy now.)

Otherwise, things are going SSDD. Wx is getting colder (and wetter is on the way). Tonight we (stupidly) turn the clocks back so it’ll get dark really early from now to next June. I think I’ve found the department where I can apply for all that daylight we’ve saved over the last Century though, so maybe I can get some of that and sprinkle it over my house on those really dark days? One can hope! It might be class action suit time …

Goodbye, Sean. James Bond hasn’t been the same without you. Thanks!

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