Sometimes the Southern in me just baffles my lovely-young-bride of 35 years. Like, when I feel the urge, nay, the imperative demands of my upbringing and DNA, to make myself a pot of black-eyed peas. (Or a pot of pinto beans for that matter.) Her being from Southern Toledo you’d think she have a modicum of an inkling of wisp of an idea of what I be going through. Didn’t they soak their beans or black-eyed peas in water for a few hours before cooking? Didn’t they add a couple of slices of bacon (or ham-hocks if I had any)? Did they even have black-eyed peas or pinto beans?

Nope. She just rolls her eyes and eats something else. Same when she makes me liver. She has mac-n-cheese.

My Ex-, a long LONG time ago, a Utah girl, when we were still newlyweds and much enamored of each other, after hearing me talk about “cornbread,” decided to make me some while I was at work one day. She was so proud of herself. Anticipated a pleasurable positive response for her thoughtfulness. She met me at the door, (mostly) in her favorite negligee and, literally, dragged me to the table so I could eat her cornbread.

It would have been much (much) better if she had not made regular bread with whole corn kernels mixed in. But, it was bread with corn in it. I ate every bite; smiling the whole time. It wasn’t much later that I suggested she look up the recipe for cornbread next time we went to the bookstore. (This was WAY before the Internet. 1974.) Which she did. (You should have seen the look on her face when she realized …)

And, somehow, even though she was mortified by her error (being a young lady from Salt Lake City and all), it was MY FAULT for just eating the bread with corn in it and not telling her right away the mistake she’d made. And she never let me forget it either.

But, being only barely 21 years old, and perpetually horny, I really enjoyed that negligee she was almost wearing. I’d have probably eaten her “cornbread” slathered with pig snot as long as I’d gotten laid. (And I didn’t even have to use the snot.)

This “Spring Cleaning” bug has taken me firmly by the proboscis, the old snozolla, and will not let me go. Today I cleared out all the kitchen pantry shelves and “organized” all the stuff as I put it back. Or threw it away as needed. Found some jello that had a use by date of 2011. I think I finally figured out I’m not going to make it so out it went. Any dry goods 2 years or less past their expiration date stays. I ain’t wasteful or nuttin’.

But, it was a nice day so I spent some time outside working on my raised beds getting ready for planting season. Did plant some peas since they’ll grow in cooler weather. Transplanted two of my blueberry bushes because they just are not thriving where they were. I think I can save them though. We’ll see. Need to get some more mushroom compost this year. And a “friend” for my lonely grape plant.

Yep, forgot to hit “send” last night. So, here it is almost 0800. I’ve been up almost 2 hours and I’m already ready for a nap. I hate this getting old crap.